When people say "before I was a parent, I expected _____ about raising kids, but now..." What it kind of sounds like to me is "don't bother spending these waiting years preparing to be a good parent; you'll only get it wrong." Thing is, I sincerely disagree.
I know preparation isn't the same as living it. But the solution to the barren thinking they would never let their kids throw fits in grocery stores is to share your experience, not put them down for trying to plan well and aim for good things. I think it is a huge problem that many people enter parenthood with so little experience, training (discipleship), or intentionality. They have no idea what are reasonable expectations.
On the other hand, believe it or not, many childless people have lots of experience interacting with non-ideal children. Some have seen lots of different homes and had more time and less personal investment (defensiveness) to synthesize what they've learned. It isn't everything. It is NO justification for them being arrogant or judgmental. But God seemed to put parents together with non-parents, in community, so maybe we could learn from each other and encourage one another instead of silencing our companions.
To God be all glory.
Sunday, March 31, 2019
Parents and the Barren and Expectations
The Authoress is
Lisa of Longbourn
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