Biblical Benevolence

I've been pondering recently. The Bible says that women are to be keepers at home. In several passages from the Old and New Testaments God's Word defines a woman's role. Also given are instructions for how the Church is to use its money. The two primary "budget line items" as we would say in my church are support of teaching elders and missionaries, and gifts to the poor, including widows. Why did widows especially need the Church's monetary assistance? Women were not income-garnering workers. Their ministries were to the Church as much as pastors' were.

At the churches I have attended or about which I've heard, benevolence is usually a one-time activity. We couldn't possibly only make a one-time gift to the pianist or treasurer. Yet the poor, hard-working members are suffering in near-despair, going into debt, and sending or keeping the women at work because our congregation does not prioritize benevolence. In addition, there is a philosophy among those with the checkbook and others that only those proving they are worthy should receive benevolence, and that it would be wrong for them to become dependent.

In the prayer requests it is not uncommon to hear these prayer requests from women:
I'm having a hard time with situations and relationships at work. Pray for wisdom. Pray for a new job.
I need a full time job and affordable childcare for my kids.
I have an interview for a job. Pray I get a full time job so I can support myself.

As a praying member of the church, I find it hard to give these to God. Am I betraying the women by praying they don't get jobs, don't find childcare, and instead of resolving the conflicts at work, that they get the hint that they are better suited to the home? What can I do?

This summer was the first time I was exposed to Christians who take God's commands to care for widows and other Christians seriously. They literally do all they can to enable women in their churches to stay home and homeschool their children. In addition Doug Phillips gave the evening address, on the Role of Women in the Local Church, the first night of our homeschool conference. The point I most appreciate from his presentation is that the Church is suffering because its women are missing. Who is caring for the poor, organizing meals and help for new mothers, preparing other ministries of the Church? How often have I mourned the fact that all the women not attending a Bible study were too busy with soccer practices or work or their own school to babysit?

In conclusion, women should be given the option, at least, to remain home, to dedicate themselves to the things described in 1 Timothy 5 and Titus 2. Those responsible for enabling this are male heads of households and the Church.

"Let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than sixty years of age, having been the wife of one husband, and having a reputation for good works: if she has brought up children, has shown hospitality, has washed the feet of the saints, has cared for the afflicted, and has devoted herself to every good work."

"Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."

To God be all glory.